Assaulted women suffer from a feeling of isolation and fear. This is natural in the circumstances. It is natural to feel unable to talk about abuse, to feel helpless or confused.

The important thing to remember is that you do have choices

Many factors paralyse our will to act -- economic and emotional dependence on the spouse ranks high on the list, followed closely by social pressure. But speaking out against violence is a power that lies in our hands at all times.

Even if you cannot take immediate action towards safety you can talk to us or to an NGO in your city for support and possible ways to empower yourself to build a safe and happy life.

Domestic Violence (DV) is an ugly truth in too many lives. It is so common that it may almost seem normal. Domestic Violence is not acceptable to the individual victim and to the society.

How do you detect Domestic Violence?

• Does your spouse force you into any sexual activity? Does your spouse physically or verbally abuse you, in private or in public?
• Does your spouse threaten to throw you out of the house or divorce you?
• Does your spouse use the children to threaten you?
• Does your spouse restrict your contact with your family and friends?
• Does your spouse or his/her family make demands of money from you or your family?

• Are you forced to use contraceptive measures against your wishes?
• Are you forced to work or restrained from working outside the house?
• Do you have no control over your personal income?

'YES' to three or more questions means that you have just identified a victim of Domestic Violence. This recognition is the first step towards change.

Most victims of domestic violence are women. They come from all social and economic backgrounds. Domestic Violence happens within the family - it is a way of controlling another person. Victims of domestic violence suffer physical injury, live in fear in and of their homes, and have no power over their lives.

What constitutes Domestic Violence?

Physical Abuse - hitting, slapping, kicking, punching, burning, choking, not allowing you to leave the house, using physical objects to cause injury.

Mental Abuse - threats, dictating what you can and cannot do, verbally abusing or insulting you.

Sexual Abuse - rape, unwanted touching, forcing sexual acts, refusal to practice safe sex.

Economic or Property Abuse - stealing or destroying personal belongings, demanding money, withholding basic needs such as food and clothing, not allowing you to work.

These are, individually and collectively, conscious acts of Domestic Violence. If you or someone you know is being so abused. The first thing to do is recognise that you are not alone.

DO NOT JUSTIFY OR BLAME YOURSELF FOR SOMEONE ELSE'S VIOLENT BEHAVIOUR. YOU DESERVE TO BE SAFE.

Take a step towards healing and prevention. If you have any questions on DV prevention, or the safety and healing of any person you know or yourself, please write to us .

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